What annoys you the most?

This article is sure to have you sigh with the reminder of life’s annoying inconveniences including accidents and messes.

Stubbing your toe 

If humanity ever undergoes any massive evolutionary changes, I hope one of them is streamlined extremities. If I bash my toe on my desk any more, it’s gonna be reduced to a bloody stump.

Pet management 

Having a pet can be a very enriching experience. It’s also a very hands-on experience, made more difficult without the use of verbal communication. No, Lloyd, you’re supposed to pee in the box, not on my shoes.

Traffic  

Sometimes, there’s a good reason for traffic, like an accident or road closures. Other times, it’s because someone abandoned an unmarked white van in the middle of a five-lane road during rush hour. Yes, that really happened to me once.

Children on a Plane 

Sometimes, I wish there were airlines exclusive for people who don’t have kids. Nicer seats, quieter, no weird smells- well, less weird smells. And everyone who has kids can just use every other airline.

Tangled headphone wires 

I am convinced that there is a tiny race of gremlins living in every backpack and drawer whose sole mission in life is to tie knots in wires. I can’t think of any other way they can get as badly tangled as they do.

Hangnails 

The moment you see that little point of skin sticking out of your finger, your fate has been sealed. You can try to remove it any way you can think of, but sooner or later you’re going to end up with a big line of pure pain running up your finger.

Sneeze that won’t come out 

I don’t claim to understand the mechanics behind sneezing, I just wish they were consistent. If I get the urge to sneeze, I better have a sneeze come out, or I’m speaking to my brain’s manager.

DMV 

Managing a country’s worth of drivers is difficult. I get that, really, I do. But it might be just a smidge less difficult if the DMV weren’t a maze of lines and overly-detailed forms.

Slow walkers 

Slow walkers wouldn’t be so bad if they kept to one side of the sidewalk/hallway, but they always seem to go out of their way to take up as much space as possible. Just because you don’t have anywhere to be doesn’t mean I don’t.

Self-checkout 

As someone who has managed self-checkouts at a grocery store, I hate them with a fiery passion. Each one was broken in its own special, stupid way. The belt gets stuck, the sensor doesn’t sense properly, or maybe the change shute is busted! It’s like the world’s worst slot machine.

Bottles that won’t open 

Why are the caps on bottles serrated? It’s a twisty top! You’re supposed to twist it! Don’t tell me to put my hand on something and then put a sharp edge on it.

Pushy food bloggers 

“Wait, don’t start eating yet, I wanna take a picture first!” I didn’t buy this food for you to have a photo session, Karen. I bought it to eat it.

Packed carts in the express lane 

The express lane is for twelve items or less. No, I don’t care if you don’t want to wait in a regular line, you don’t get to break the rules just because you don’t feel like being patient. People with actual small orders need to use the express lane, and you’re holding them up.

Loud chewing 

I’m all for enjoying your food, but the sound of eating and the taste of the food don’t really have anything to do with each other. Close your mouth and chew quietly, please.

Not holding the door 

You should always hold the door in public for other people. Unless you’re actively bleeding out or giving birth or something, you can spare a few seconds for common courtesy.

Pen clickers 

If you need something to keep your hands busy in a boring situation, there’s plenty of things you can do that are far less annoying to others than clicking a pen. Like spinning it, for example! Pen spinning is cool, do that.

Forgetting to charge your phone 

You’ve just come home from a long day, and you promptly collapse into bed, content to leave any of the day’s remaining woes for future you to sort out. Then you wake up the next morning and realize you didn’t juice your phone up, and all of your mobile technological advances have been lost. Curse you, past me!

Double-parkers 

I don’t understand people who think they have a right to more than one parking spot. I’ve seen motorcycles taking up two spots before! It’s one spot; you put your car in it. It’s not that difficult.

Elevator crowders 

Being in an elevator with others is already too close for some people, so the last thing they need is some rando breathing down their neck. If you’ve got more room to stand, kindly use it.

Gross bathrooms 

It almost feels like a personal insult when an intimate place like a bathroom is covered in mysterious substances. From who, I don’t know. Most likely, whoever used it before you.

Smoking 

There’s pretty much no net positive to smoking. It makes you smell, it makes everything around you smell, it chokes people, and besides all of that, there’s, y’know, cancer. Addiction is one thing, but if you’re just smoking for the sake of smoking, then go do it somewhere else.